The last week or so I haven't really had the motivation to write a new update, but I have returned!  My boyfriend and I have been house and dog sitting for some friends that have gone overseas, and because our housemates have also gone away we have been feeding their dog as well.  This means going home every day to feed her then coming back here.  The good thing about this has been I've had lots of doggies to walk!  My diet has been pretty atrocious though.

On the upside they have a scale here and I weighed myself.  The damage wasn't as bad as I thought as I'm the same weight I was when I weighed in at my doctors office about 7 months ago.  I'm pretty sure I lost weight around Christmas though because I went camping on an island for a few weeks and was very physically active and I felt like I had lost weight.  Obviously I've regained what I had lost.

Our friend's house is only a couple of blocks from a street that has many yummy food spots and restaurants, so we did get take out a couple of times and I have indulged a little too much.  But I decided today I am going to start being the person I want to be, the person who makes healthy choices and someone who doesn't rely on food to make me feel better.

I feel like my major problem is the constant war inside my head when it comes to food and the way I allow myself to give in too easily sometimes.  Then when I give in a little I reason with myself that I may as well go all out and restart the next day.  The problem is that this happens too consistently so that most days end up being bad days.  I want to get back to not caring about food so much and seeing it as fuel rather than something that makes me feel better emotionally.  Quitting smoking recently has not helped this process because I have developed a sweet tooth and a huge appetite where I just want to eat everything and even after the point of fullness I keep going.

I feel like every aspect of my life is effected by my weight, from the way people treat me like I'm invisible 2nd class person (even family and friends), to the impending health issues I face if I don't make this change in my life.

So far today has been a good day and I'm not feeling hungry.  I've had my breakfast shake, an apple, tea without milk and taken the dogs for a nice walk.  I plan on having soup for lunch and not eating after dinner!  Those are my goals for the rest of the day. 

Another new goal: update this thing more!